Instagram: @heather.whelpley
Facebook: Heather Whelpley
LinkedIn: Heather Whelpley
http://www.heatherwhelpley.com
Questions Discussed
1. You’ve worked with many different businesses, U of M, Ameriprise, BWC and more. What are your most popular topics of discussion and what do you hope to achieve during those discussions?
Imposter Syndrome is the number one topic requested. It was named in the 1970s but we are recently starting to talk about it and how it’s holding us back in our careers. When Heather started her business it was not her plan to focus on Imposter Syndrome, she started with those in career transitions and as she got into it she realized how much the inner critique and imposter syndrome came into play and affected women. That’s when she designed her first Imposter Syndrome workshop and within a month or two she was getting bookings because the topic was so popular. People were relieved to know they weren’t alone and could get some tools to manage it.
2. What is Imposter Syndrome and what are some tips you can use to overcome it?
Feeling like an imposter or a fraud. Do I really belong here, are people going to find me out? I don’t truly feel qualified to share my opinion with senior leaders or in meetings. It is an inaccurate self assessment of our skills and qualifications. You do actually know enough to share with others what you know.
3. Why do you think Imposter Syndrome is coming out in the media more these days?
Anyone out of the dominant power structure is more likely to experience Imposter Syndrome. If you sit in a room and are the minority such as the only women or only person of color then it might make you feel like you don’t belong and have a voice. There has also been some really good publications released such as “The Confidence Code”, and Michelle Obama’s book “Becoming” that discuss Imposter Syndrome. When famous people bring it up it usually tends to shed more light on the subject.
4. What are some ways we can combat the inner critique?
-Choose to do it anyway. Listen to the voice inside of you that is telling you need to do this instead of listening to the voice of fear of failure.
-Purposefully look for the evidence of your success. At the end of each day write down the things you did really well. It will help you remember the positive things you have completed instead of focusing on the negative. It will help give you a better grasp of reality.
5. How do we pay more attention to compliments vs. criticism?
We tend to ignore the work compliment and say we just got lucky, or it was because of our team, or it wasn’t as good as we wanted and instead we should challenge ourselves to say “Thank you!”
6. What are some ways that women can find out what they really want and what brings them joy? How do they reconnect with themselves?
Heather is teaching women how to let go and fit joy into their lives. What is standing in the way of you finding joy? It’s different for every person. Ask yourself “what am I trying to prove when I’m achieving?” Once you can work through what’s standing in your way, you can then move into what you want to add into your life, say no to, or ask for help with. Slowly work towards doing things that are less about proving and more about finding joy. Work from joy and inspiration instead of the need to prove yourself.
7 . What are some tips you’ve found helpful for slowing down, being less stressed, and not feeling like you have to do it all?
Notice when you’re in manic mode, when your body is going faster than it actually needs to be going. Recognize what manic mode is for you in your own body. When you notice it, you need to pause and breathe. It’s not about doing less, it’s about being in a calmer space. For example, you don’t need to literally run to a meeting, just slow down, you will get to the meeting either way. Another one is accepting and asking for help. Heather is also creating a program for 5 meditations that are all under 4 minutes. She has designed them so you can do them really quickly even when you’re in the bathroom.
8. Tell us about your book and what things you are writing about?
It’s Heather’s first book, tentative title is “The Valedictorian Complex” How can high achieving women learn to let go of expectations and create their own rules for life. If you are a consistent overachiever what are you trying to prove and whose rules are you living by? Are those the rules you want to be living by? Also, redefining success and creating your own rules for life. It is memoir/part coaching book. It will be very inneractive and activity orientated.
-The book will hopefully be released the first half of 2020.
9. Favorite book recommendations on this topic or others?
-Playing Big by Tara Moore. She also has a playing big leadership program.
-The Secret Thoughts of Successful Women
-Choose Wonder Over Worry by Amber Ray
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